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I am so happy he's been caught for his disgusting acts.
Plus there are tons of other reasons to go. Set a good example. Maybe your bravery will help a younger girl come forward. And go for yourself. It'll help you start addressing what happened to you. Even if police decide his behavior falls more the disgusting side than the criminal side, it's very important for you to start working on it for yourself.
And honey go to a rape crisis center. It's not too dramatic. He hurt you, took advantage of you sexually. Maybe you won't end using the word "rape" to label what happened. Maybe you will. The criminal aspect does not define what goes on inside you. Crime has the burden of proof whereas you know what happened and how you felt. You feel used, violated. And yes you were so young. A rape crisis center can help you even if it turn out to be not a matter for the law. Let the law decide if it's their matter.
So first go to the rape crisis center. They'll have someone to advise you on contacting the police. Then go to the police.
Take care Victoria. You don't need the law to label the level of fault and violation you feel. Clearly he is a violator. Go do what you need to do. Take what you've learned in such a painful way and tell girls to keep their wits about sex, repect and protect themselves. You sound like a strong young woman. Good luck.
Dan
The sexually abused draw up the statistics because they become attractive targets for future predators. Predators can tell who to work on.
Of course hurt girls want attention! Who doesn't want attention? What's wrong with attention?
I think violated children kind of live with a perpetual hunger for the moment they dreamed of when mom or dad would burst into the room, stab the violator in the neck, and then hold and comfort him or her for as long as it took. The hunger for attention tries to chip away at that moment when you were SURE you were inocent and the attacker evil. At 18, you're not so sure anymore. But you still want comfort.
Symphathy isn't pity. There's nothing wrong with attention or sympathy. You deserve it. It belongs to you. What's more, it's hard to move on without it.
Rape crisis centers often have good counselors. Sounds like you found one elsewhere. That's good.
That fear that no one will believe you because you've been promiscuous is common too. That's a big part of the old chauvanist machine. Put your foot down about that. Being promiscuous is your choice/freedom/right/mistake to make, whatever you want to call it. If it's part of what you need (needed) to work out who you are, it's your right. No one has the right to prey on you or blame you for choices you were free to make. Any woman, from a wife to a prostitute, and even a promiscuous girl, can fall prey to a rapist.
A new nasty little dynamic we have going on these days (sprung from that old "she's the type of girl who deserves it") is attaching some revulsion to victimhood. "I'm nobody's victim!" is an admirable stance. Well that's bullshit for someone who has been assaulted. You have to understand that you were a victim and being a victim is someone else's fault, not yours. Then you can work on moving on.
What you're probably talking about with this Aaron creature is sometimes called "gray rape" these days. Clearly your mom's boyfriend sexually assaulted you. Clearly boys you've dated who you wanted to have sex with, even if it was because you felt needy, did not rape you. And Aaron falls somewhere in between, a gray area.
If you are not going to the police and accusing him of rape, then there's nothing to not believe. Be honest about everything, your confusion and the consent you did give. Leave it to the police to sort out. Maybe it won't be labeled "rape." That doesn't mean it wasn't deceptive, abusive, cruel. You have every right to be hurt, even if what he did to you wasn't criminal.
You will want to run it by your counselor before you go to the police. Get advice and support, know what you can and should not expect.
Sounds like you're doing a fine job, Victoria. Do some reading. Women almost always doubt and blame themselves. They fall for it when others blame them. It's classic. Read about how abused children think about themselves, how they feel and act as adults. predators twist victims' heads. You can grow past it. Sounds like you're working hard to do that.
You're only 21. So young. It's such a tough time. You can change your sad sad movie. I feel certain you will. You sound like a hard worker, tough, ready to take things on. That hard work will bear fruit and in a few years you'll be able to feel sad for the messed up, hurt girl you were, but she won't quite be you anymore.
i always did get a weird vibe from you.....
creeper.
Please don't think that I'm saying there is no way this is possible, because I'm not, I'm just saying that I never saw it coming. My heart goes out to these girls and I hope they are doing okay.
To your name is . on your posting. I would greatly appreciate if you did share your opinion, and what do you mean you know the whole history and development of the situation?
Dan thank you very much once again. your replies have really affected me deeply. thank you for the time and the support you have been willing to give to me.
It seems that just about everyone here that has posted knows Aaron in some way. Obviously he got around. I’m willing to bet that all but maybe one is female. After all that happened between me and Aaron this really doesn’t surprise me a bit. My heart dropped when I saw his story on 2 news Friday night, it’s like it all came back to me. I felt like I had let it go, and I have up to a certain point. I guess just remembering has sucked me back in.
All I know is that I am so happy to be with my current love. I had gotten with him shortly after what had happened with Aaron, so we have been together a long time. He doesn’t know anything about Aaron or what had happened to me. I know in my heart that I get to tell him, (I’m really big with honesty) but at the same time I’m scared to.
I keep having these feelings of anger fear and regret popping up the last couple of days. I just want this all to end.
By the way does anyone know the status of where Aaron is right now? Still in police custody? Or is he still living in that hell whole. if anyone of you had been to his house you would know what I’m talking about. Also I had talking to him on msn about 2-3 weeks ago, just hi, how are you, bleh bleh bleh type of thing. I could defiantly tell that he was still a jerk so I stopped talking to him and blocked hi, but I did learn that he had a baby. Does anyone know anything about that story? I send out my blessings to that little one. I hope he/she is in the best care of the mother right now.
Thank all of you for you postings they have assisted me greatly. Good night.
My daughter, roughly your age, hates when I spout relationship advice for young adults, but that rarely me. So: People are entitled to their private thoughts. You don't have to tell your boyfriend anything you don't want to that doesn't have to do with him. Besides, young people have trouble differentiating between asking for loving support and using a partner as a counselor. That last is a no no for relationship health. Sometimes a partner will feel compelled to "fix." Plenty of relationship start on the slippery slope because people get too fused and don't have good boundaries.
It's not a secret. It's private, for now. When it's time to tell him, you'll know. If you want to tell him now so he can support you better, you might ask your counselor to help you figure out what it is you want to achieve by telling him. Helps to clarify. Just make it clear to him that all you need is his love and understanding and there's nothing he can "do." I'm sure he's a great guy if he was lucky enough to get you.
I had met his parents also. and his brother and sister for that matter. He intruduced me to all his family. His parents are great. They are very friendly people. But in less he is living in a different house than he used to with his parents 3 years ago than it was not a good home. So you dated him? What happened in your relationship? Did he ever try to sleep with you? Did it ever happen? I didnt understand your post to well. Maybe you can give us a little more? I hope your relationship with Aaron what a lot better than mine was. And to tell you the truth this doesnt surprise me at all either. Im just glad he finally got cought.
Where did you get that information? Can you copy and paste the URL?
Im sorry for the misunderstanding in the way I worded one of my sentences.
I DONT know the history or development behind this case right here. I knew him but we never were close enough that I would know about his dating "history and system". Also, what I meant by not sharing my opinion is because of just that fact, that I really don't know anything about the girls he dated and how often and etc,. I cant speak my mind for him and those girls. I think someone else brought up a good point early in this discussion board that it was interesting how the news said 'it was interesting that he actually took them out and got to know their families...' Because that IS called dating. Im sure a girl would allow that if she was mutual about it as well. Now, I am not saying in any any any case that anyone else besides him has played a part in bringing on this situation. Clearly something about him and his doings have brought him to this popint where he is now. That's clear. Im simply saying because I dont know the girls and their dating and lifestyle, and very vaguely know his, Im in no position to make a biased opinion.
How can you sit there and say that Aaron was not like this? Obviously he was. And why are you accusing all these girls of accusing rape when "it was not". You were not there when it happened. Sorry to say but you have no say in what really happened.. YOU WERE NOT THERE! And as for calling all the girls weak? that’s the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. I would defiantly say that all these girls are strong for owning their voice and telling their stories. Aaron’s story was aired on the news on Friday night. At that time there were 5 girls that had come forward to the police about their relations with Aaron. I doubt all those girls knew each other and decided to "screw him over" and report some bullshit. I went and talked to the detective today and told my story. It was very hard. But I learned that I’m not the only one to come forward sense Friday. There was another girl. So that’s a total of 7 girls to come forth. doesn’t that seem a little weird to you? And as for you being his sons aunt, that’s great! That means you can make sure he gets the best care that he deserves! I don’t know the situation with Aaron and his sons mother, but I do know that I had talked to him on msn 3 weeks ago and he told me about how she broke it off with him. But I can’t listen to anything his guy says, its all bull to me. Obviously Aaron was not ready to become a father. If he was he would have dropped all this behavior and cleaned up to become a wonderful parent. Obviously that didn’t happen. I pray for his baby that he will by okay. But he will not have Aaron in his life for a long time. And if I were the mother I would be thinking if I would ever let Aaron into the baby’s life after what has happened. You really think it would be wise to let a sex offender raise a baby? I don’t know that’s the mothers choice. But I hope she makes the best choice possible for what happens in her baby’s life.
Next time think about who you are calling weak, cause in reality these girls have the most strong souls for coming forward with this terrible nightmare.
"Rape" is the term for intercourse with a child in this country. It does not require force, only manipulation. In less developed nations, men may marry children and legally rape them. Not here. He we are sophisticated enough to know that a child cannot consent. We know an adult predator may talk a child into just about anything. Ever wonder why kids rarely turn in predators who do icky things to them? Kids are weak under adult power adults, that's why.
Predators tend to choose needy or messed up kids. They're easier to manipulate. And being overtly sexual at such a young age is a sign of prior abuse.
No one is saying Aaorn was violent or used physical force. He is a predator and they rarely need physical force.
up his life . The laws need to be changed to protect the men to, not just women from she said he said shit. the proof will be out soon enogh and aarons true friends have been by his side and we all will fight because he is innosent.... so make comments of facts none of you have .but we do have some things and guess what that is love, faith, and trust in the justice system and prooff beond reasonable dought.... there is none..I dont know who tiffany is I will find out becuase that is my dead sister and aarons thank you but please dont use her name. my family is very good ,we didnt have alot of money but we always had a place to live. none of you really know him and your opions (the rude ones) dont help any one. aaron is loved and he has MANY people there to help him from ths cruel slander...........
You can't imagine how incredibly pissed it makes many of us readers to hear you say middle school girls even sat in your parents' home and socialized, were allowed even that level of acceptance for interacting with a grown man. Considering that even that is incredibly inappropriate, and considering how protective most citizens are of children, there's bound to be a lot of ugly stuff here.
I know saying this will make you angry, but so you don't make yourself crazy, it would be a lot better for you to avoid these discussions. It's not fair for you to have to see the ugly feelings people have toward your brother. Of course you want to support and stick by your brother. You are a good sister. But this place will only make you angry and helpless.
I hope you get through this awful time ok.
And holding a man responsible in these situations usually includes jail time.
Children and adults operate under an entirely different set of expectations and consequences.
Also, wouldn't we come down on say, Ashton Cushter or Johny Depp? They are extremely handsome older men girls ooh and fawn over. Would Brad Pitt (in his 40s) be permitted a 13 year old girlfriend cuz he's a hottie? I think not. We see this guy looking like a Tiger Beat pinup and somehow we think the girls want to have sex with him. That's a misperception. They don't.
I have never ever met a 13 year old girl who wants sex. 14 or 15 either. They often say "Ew, I am never doing that. I'll hire a surrogate someday." They just can't image wanting it. That is a male fantasy about nubile girls. What they do very much want is a boyfriend, a cute guy just like they see on TV. They want love texts, flowers, to be the girl with the hottie, and for the guy to think they're valuable, a.k.a. sexy here in America.
A girl can be talked into sex to please and keep a boyfriend, easy. Sex itself is meaningless at best, usually scary and undesirable. So get over that nyphette idea. It's pure fantasy. College woman know, females can be with a guy and say no to sex. Sadly little girls do not know this, are told sex is obligatory, especially for little lolitas like them.
Wait, I take that back, there are nymphettes, girl who were taught far too young exactly what men want. They're the 12 and 13 year olds who give sexual attention way beyond their years. I've seen an 11 year old act nearly like a lap dancer. These are damaged children who actually are many years behind their peers in experiencing genuine sexual desire.
If anything, in flirting, these disturbed girls are often asking to be shown that not all men are pigs. They are asking to be shown men's limits. That's why we have to nail men to the wall who take advantage of this damage, this vulnerability.
Just because a kid is all giggles over a cute guy in no way means she has anything in mind but kiddie dreams. This is an incredibly vulnerable age.
Kids don't want sex, they want attention. Kids are entitled to flirt, tease, experiment with provocation of one sort or another. In fact they need ot on many levels. Even though this is something the silly chicklettes do, we don't let the middles school become meat markets.
I don't believe there are any accusations of physical force. Children can't consent. That's a pedophile's twisted argument, because children of any age almost never say no to an adult.
I'm not commenting on your brother's guilt, only age-appropriate actions.
I've some across predators on this site. They are a hard bunch to connect with. I like to get the facts out.
you and I should probably tussle privately about what young men do and do not know, but I don't know how to do that. Techno ignoramous.
You sound like a very positive person, very generous about people's intentions, desire a balanced perspective. I think you're wrong when your approach comes to young men in this situation. I believe you are misguidedly generous. They know full well what they're doing. It is a hot topic.
We've been talking about choosing to abandon empathy. Desensitization. Guys know, they feel their conscience nibbling at the back of their minds as they work to score, especially when it is someone young. There's a whole culture around getting young girls, scoring with them and not getting caught. Age of consent and exactly who constitutes a superior are topics of discussion for kids.
I've got a 24 year old man trying to hush up seeing a 17 year old because his role makes it somewhat inappropriate. Young people are very conscious of this stuff.
Just as someone chooses to push through conscience pangs when committing crimes of violence, push though conscience as the acts become bigger and bigger, guys push through those pangs to prey on easy, vulnerable targets. Who wants the work of negotiating with a 21 year old woman who is savvy, has self respect, knows her worth, can set limits, is an intellectual equal, when it's so easy to get a malleable wahini in the sack?
Guys do know better. I can tell you dozens of things that are eye openers for them, but not this one. They know better.
Or, they may have had something bad happen to them when they were young, and figure that since the person who did it to them did not get 'caught', they will not get caught.
There are no clear definitions set for either the males or females as to what is and is not acceptable and why it is or is not.
In this case, this 21 year old sought young girls out, and had many victims. I doubt very much if he just decided at a certain age to start doing this. Maybe there is a whole sub culture today, that thinks it is cool to fuck a virgin, so therefore they go after young girls, but we have allowed this to happen.
First, by allowing him the means, and secondly, by providing the victim.
You don't think that there is something wrong in this young man's life, that he is compelled to engage in this type of behavior? I think there is something wrong. Sure, every family member is nice, but what happens behind the closed doors? Did something happen, or is the upbringing lacking in some way, so that he gradually chose to use his energy this way?
Was he taught to respect women, or view them as sexual objects? Were the young girls taught that guys will 'go after' them for sex, and what can happen?
He hides it well from his friends, co-workers, whatever the case may be, at least from what I have read here.
That counter culture better wake up before they all find themselves in jail, and destroy many families in the process.
If not what are you ?
just curious..
13 is a preying on a child. Baby breasts do not a woman make. And it doesn't make her free game.
We are all fooled by media and wishful thinking that young girls want sex. They don't. They want love and attention, approval. They are acting as they were taught. Later, they are hurt, have problems, feel devalued. I have talked to maybe 200 girls to learn this. (300 maybe?) Plus tons of reading. 13 year olds want flirting, sexy attention, a boyfriend, to be cool and grown. It's a precurser to genuine desire. And yes, just touching a 13 year old always produces an "ew" response. The only except is a peer of long-acquaintance.
You called it. I'm totally obsessed. I'm calling this time research. In addition to figuring out how adults make this climate, I've gotten to talk to pedophiles. I've only had access to a few of those in real life.
still don't agree with you about little girls these days,but not going to spend all of my free time arguing the issue with you.You have your opinion,and I have mine. I know I am not alone here.
Men who believe 13 year old children want sex are often inclined to cultivate that for their fantasy life. It's a myth from a male dominant culture.
what kind of expert are you. where is your degree.Thats all I am sayin
wow you sure are big girl using the word fuck. you must be over 18. also maybe you shouldn't admit to everybody how big of a slut you are!!
who cares if you had sex with aaron before and after my sister. once again your cool! obviously you need to keep your legs closed. its girls like you that make up things and put boys in jail for something that is your problem. maybe you should stop bragging about it. because of your one of the girls prosecuting him this will be great for his case seeing you obviously think its funny.
everyone peyton is none of your concern he is in the best care and always has been. how old kylee is also none of your concern we have the most beautiful thing in the whole world because of it sooooo shut your mouths or ill turn you in for slander! its absolutely ruducilous of how less you people know of whats really going on.....
Sooooo lets not be stupid here...... obvioulsy your parents didnt pay much attention to how old the boys you were dating were... thats not aarons fault!!!!!!!
Go fuck off! Everyone of you that are concerned about peyton and his mother AKA Me can all shut up. Keep your mouths closed about my son!!!! I swear I will prosectue all of you for slander if you dont stop talkin about it. Ya i was 17 you stupid bitch But that means nothing i had sex with aaron YAY! You can do the math wow your smart. Maybe you should close your legs and quit bragging about having sex with him BEFORE and AFTER i got pregnant personally i dont give a shit. Im not with aaron any more.
But i guess you didnt know any better (poor me poor me)
Honestly i trust aaron with my life and yes he might have slept with minors but dont forget you had sex with him too! Its sad your parents arent there for you enough so you have to go sleep with older guys to get there attention.
And for Peyton he is the best thing that ever happened to me in my life so keep your mouths closed and next time Me or him come up dont be shocked when you have a letter in the mail asking for you to be in court!!
Why ever would I list my qualifications? What would be the point on a blog where one may say nearly anything? If my words ring true, you know. If not, you have to examine your personal agendas.
Sure, lots of badass chicklettes I work with do stupid things that hurt them, swear up and down to me they love it. Like blowing three classmates in one day behind an equipment shed. Then, when the guys talk, when they catch something, when they get pregnant, when no one wants to be their boyfriend, or whatever, they cry and cry for how they compromised themselves.
Girls are entitled to explore their new sexuality without men or porn or MTV interpretting their feelings for them.
This is what predators do to groom kids, what pedophile say to lower the age of consent. "Kids have sexual feelings. Ahah! See! fuck them!"
What a predator does in a vulnerable, inexperienced kid who doesn't yet know him or herself yet is interpret his or her feeling, play up their natural feelings. That is precisely why children are so damaged by sexual abuse, why they don't tell and never ever scream. They think they liked it because a bequiling adult tells them they do. Then they feel slimy if they liked parts of it (approval, friendship, attention, even the touches in a way.)
That is the very heart of why sex with children is incredibly wrong and damaging. In a way, the child vicitimzes him or herself.
They have thoughts and fantasies. They may dream of doing it with Brad Pitt every night. They may think they really want Brad Pitt to come do them. It's a safe dream they may explore in fantasy. But when a girl is coaxed into acting by a man, it's a rude awakening. The pain is nearly intolerable even to an observer. It devalues them at an essential level. It's a mistake they should never have a chance to make., no matter how good the initial attention and desireability made them feel.
I too have seen 11 year olds doing their best to get a man to have sex with them. Statistics show us these girls were abused at a younger age.
Aaron did rape her because 13 is an age that cannot consent. It is the definition of rape.
A girl may dream of doing Brad pitt every night. There is safety in fantasy to explore desire.
I have seen the wreckage of girls being told by external sources that yes, you like his ass, he has pretty eyes, that means you're a woman, have sex. They push through their natural aversion and pay later.
He did rape her because sex with a child of 13 is, by definition, rape.
I agree with R. Dan,are these girls your talking to really telling you the truth. It sounds like you are a counselor or something and these girls are not going to tell you that they really do have and enjoy having sex. But have some children of your own and then listen up on a conversation when they don't know your there then you will hear what they really think.
This myth of 12 year olds want ing sex is exactly the arguemnt the pedophile groups are using to try to lower the age of consent to 12. A kid should not be punished like that because she is acting brassy.
A straight 10 year old boy can be made to "want" and "consent" to sex with a grown man. Wiring in a kids head makes them vulnerable to others telling them what their feelings mean. And it fucks them up plenty as they grow up.
When a child is molested or sexually abused or raped because they cannot give consent because they are too young, they are introduced to sex much much too soon, and they do not know what they are doing - they are filled with intense feelings that they do not know how to process.
Didn't any of you get anything out of what I said earlier??
Our society is so focused on sex in totally inappropriate manners, that young girls THINK they want sex, and if they are abused, it is even more of a powerful influence. Yes - it does feel good, and the circumstances of encounters with an older person are filled with ambiguous messages that make them think they want sex when what they really want is someone to love them, and give them attention.
TV, Videos, magazines, music....all is focused on sex and selling products. That is what the advertisers are counting on - us buying a product because it is portrayed as making us sexy and desirable. No matter how young we are.....
If these girls had positive good influences in their lives, they would not choose sex.
Believe me when I say that introducing children to sex is wrong, causes irreparable damage, and destroys families. I KNOW. I WAS A VICTIM. I AM NOW A SURVIVOR.
As for the offender in this case, I still say, something is wrong in that family picture if this young man is doing this to young girls.
He is not innocent. He is a predator. And, it must have started somewhere. And, this pattern will be repeated again and again, especially if he does not admit what he has done and get treatment.
Laurie,
I understand that you are a survivor of abuse and believe me I feel for you but please dont tell me you blame positive influences on why these girls chose to have sex...Some of them yes, as it sounds like your influences were not the best,But many of these girls had great families, influences, religions and they still chose to have sex. Lets forget the age difference. Through my research I believe that some kids will choose to do right or wrong according to society no matter what or who they have been brought up around. Many people have been surrounded with horrible situations and incredibly awfull family values but they recognize this and grow up to be outstanding citizens, and of course the opposite is true as well. For instance i have very strong alcoholic tendancies in my family history and i recognized this as a child so i knew that if i got involved heavily with drugs, alcohol etc. that i could end up with serious problems. This comment is only to unvalidate your comment at the beginning of my blog that you had written in yours.
you comment that you speak to college girls and they tell you all the fake out behaviours that they involved themselves in and what they saw around them with other girls. Im assuming that most of them regret this time of their lives because of some of the choices they made.
Was this a random group or a group made up of survivors of rape.
you rather repulse me..by your comment.
It sounds like you need to get a life rather than
trying to hurt others by your "I had him before and after "..Who really cares Except maybe you.
Im sure that Kylee has moved on with her life and creating the best for their son. Being supportive as im sure you all would be under any circumstances for someone involved in your lives.
YOu and I are talking about two of the same yet different stuff here.The difference is that your bringing the phycologic point of view into the discussion. I am just stating the facts that girls at he age of 13 and below are having sex and that these girls do not all come from messed up backgrounds. I first commented here because of your comment that stated that 13 year old girls do not like sex. I don't care what phyco bull shitt you post,it doesn't change the fact that both boys and girls are having sex at a very young age today and it doesn't matter what kind of parental influencing they have.
Laurie,
You have no right to say that there has to be something wrong with AArons family due to the fact that you don't know them.I, however,do know them and have for many many years and AAron has a great family.AAron is a great kid.you have no right to say different because you don't know him or his family. And no body knows what happened with aaron and those girls except for AAron and those girls so how can you judge him until you know all of the facts.
I for one have just learned from this case that the news and media do tend to blow things way out of proportion. I know from this case that i will no longer believe everything that the media says. I feel that this is a great lesson for all of us to learn.
I know exactly what you mean with the headlines in the papers, and what the media will report on and what they won't from my own personal experiences in trying to get a story out - the true and right story from my perspective.
I myself know a young man that is 21 and will be serving 7 years in prison for raping a 14 year old. That was a complicated situation - he was not trolling for girls on the internet.
From the sound of the charges, it sounded like Aaron was doing just that - it is too bad that we seem to be on a witch hunt in some of these cases, it makes it more difficult to keep a clear head about what to do as a parent, and also makes it hard to distinguish between what a true sex offender does and does not do. Young men and boys that commit a sexual offense are not always a repeat sex offender or pedophile.
And R.... if kids or teenagers have free time on their hands, and their parents do not know what they are doing, that is a problem. That is what I am talking about - some how some way, something wrong is happening, if we are truly against this type of 'thing' happening. I know all kids do somethings sometimes, but we need to follow up on details, eavesdrop, do bedroom and car searches if we have to. Whatever. We will never have perfection, but at least we need to be warned. And that goes for both sides, because sometimes young men are getting the raw deal.
That is one of the reason I have started writing on blogs - because I am a survivor and want people to know what we are up against with these types of crimes. I am trying to educate.
Unfortunately today, it seems we have to know everything as a parent and be ever vigilant. It is not easy. I realize there are many victims in this situation, the families especially. Nothing is ever the same.
Parents need to know this before their kids become teenagers, for certain. That is what's so frustrating...in many cases, parents don't see what's going on until its to late.
The three of you seem to be sending the same message over and over with different words, about how we dont have the facts so not to judge. Innicent intill proven guilty right? Well why dont you give us some facts so we can have a clue (sence you think we dont). Why dont you stand up for Aaron with facts? No I have not been to court to see whats going on... Why dont you tell us about it.
I seem to be confused about all this... How you all support him... but no facts have been presented... Thats great, but for the rest of us lookin in from the outside we are stating our opinion.
I am just taking a wild guess here when speaking for Kim, K ,and Tiffany. I know Kim.I do not know the other two girls, but I am sure that they feel the same about any man that would hurt another person in that way.
If I didn't know AAron. If I didn't know what kind of kid AAron was,I would be like all of you saying the same things you have been saying here in this blog about him.But I do know him and I do not think that he did what the news said he did.
See,You ,along with the media,are seeing AAron as going onto myspace,finding girls,getting to know them,meeting their families,gaining trust just to take the girls to his house and rape them.
Here is another way to look at this whole thing.Try to imagine what I am saying here ok.
AAron,like millions of other people surfing the web,came across myspace,found out that he could meet girls on the internet right here from utah. He met lots of girls,met their families because he was dating them.gained trust because he was a good kid to the parents of these girls thats why they let their daughters leave the house with him. He did have sex with many of them I am sure.I am not saying that its right. First of all,you don't need to sleep around like that.I do not know how anyone can have sex freely with so many people today with all of the STDs going around but it is happening.AAron is like any hormonal guy out there and was acting like most guys do. Yeah,apparently a few of them werent of the age 18 when this took place,that again was wrong.So,they call that rape. But,these charges started when AAron was 17 years old. Do you understand,he wasn't even an adult yet!!And like I have said before,these girl had to lie about they're ages to even have a myspace account. You have to be 18 to have an account.And why did the mothers let there daughters go with AAron to begin with. You think that they would have said something about the age differance. How do we know that AARon really knew how old these girls were.
I believe there is a very big differance between taking sex violently from a person without there consent "raping them" and having sex with a minor. Two very different hings there!!! Now,I can see if the guy is 30 and the girl is 13. That is just wrong and there has to be something mentally wrong with that man. But AAron was 17 when these charges started.
As far as kim giving you details from the court room,and facts that you asked for,that would just be stuipd of her. That could hurt her brothers case.And its really a family matter,not to be discussed with the public.When it is all said and done,I am sure you will hear all about it.
And for D...........
AArons biggest mistake was ever messing around with girls like you. This is why he is in trouble now.Girls like you with very big mouths and no self respect.
For Victoria,You say up above that This happened with AAron a few times,You had sex with him and wasn't strong enough to say no!!! Soooo......How was AAron susposed to know that you didn't want it if you didn't say no.
And for ....... , YOu say that You told AAron no,and it took him a minute to actually stop and realize that no means no.Well,the fact is,he did stop,he didn't rape you. He was prob really hot at that moment and it took a moment to actually stop but he did stop. What made you different,why did he not rape you? If he was a rapest he probably would not have stopped.
And for all the rest of you.
The media is saying that AAron took these girls home and raped them. Well,I know for a fact that there is always someone home at AArons house so why didn't these girls ever yell for help. And why did they always come back to visit with AAron and his family.Why would they sit and have conversations with AArons family over and over again.That doesn't make any sense to me. If I was raped by someone,I would never come back and I would have screamed loudly if someone was violating me and there was someone there that could stop it from happening.
Just doesn't make sense to me................
Tell me, did your parents ever talk to you about sex, or your brother? Did you know what was appropriate and what wasn't?
Were your computer privileges constant? Was it explained to you that there are sexual predators?
One issue that I find very frustrating, and wonder where it will end up ultimately, is that in today's climate, with all the headlines, and hunting and tracking of sex offenders, sex as a part of videos, commercials, magazines, etc etc,,,, girls splashed all over the place in sexual positions, and barely any clothes, porno all over the internet.... all these mixed messages - I wonder if some kids are going to be confused and scared, and not know what is right and wrong. Scared to talk to anyone about some urges that may start out as normal and innocent, and somehow go too far - because they do not know how to handle the rush of hormones - hormones like a drug. They are handed this information now through computers on a platter. Computers bring all sorts of information - a lot of it ugly and inaccurate, and useless, right into our homes, by the flip of a switch. This is very very dangerous.
There are many possible repercussions from parents not talking to their kids and monitoring them. Teenagers need more follow up and hugs that toddlers do - at least you can see the toddler in front of you. Teenagers love to explore.
Did anyone ever tell you what healthy sexuality was, or what it means to be in a relationship?
In my mind, everyone's family is messed up - some of us just do a better job of hiding it than others. Some of us have 'habits' or tendencies that hurt other people - again, some of the intention is is hurtful and some of the intention isn't. I was not trying to insult you. America is filled with dysfunction.
My point being, that if we don't explain to parents and kids what is right and wrong, things like this happen. Alot of parents out there today are clueless about what is going on. It does not do any good to have these types of headlines, but sex offenders are the latest group that we as a society have decided should be the target of our ire. Parents and people in general may get confused, because of the feelings of false security with the database, and surge to lock up all sex offenders.
What most people don't realize is that according to the definitions we have today, a lot of offenders are living in our own homes. The headlines and the way they are presented, makes us think that it is someone who is a monster, when in many cases it could be our son or brother, or husband.
In some ways the attention it is good, because we are finally starting to recognize this as a problem - but we have gone too far in the other direction. Attention is bringing about more treatment programs, but we still have a long way to go.
This type of behavior is messed up, and it messes up other peoples lives as well. Very damaging. But, he did not do it alone -
Observer - I agree with you as well and have been saying all along, that we are ALL to blame for these types of situations - including the young girl. Where were her parents?
Unless the girls receive treatment, this behavior will continue and they will pass on this 'knowledge' to other guys and girls, and vice versa. They probably will have other issues as they grow, unless they get treatment.
how did this happen numerous times for you.What would take you to a rapest house more than once.why would you put yourself in that situation again and again. I don't believe that he did anything harmful to you.
lol